unfinished

I wish I was a musician.
I've always been drawn to them. Artists of an unknown sort, yet oh-so-familiar.
I tag tracks posting moments that bleed into the veins of my soul...
A lyric, a verse, maybe just the rhythm that consumes me.
I am a painter. but. i feel deep. art is life....

Why can't I profess in poetic perfection?
Why must I express and expose without explanation?
I paint,
You see,
Interpret & explicate... you do under cover of seduction or soliloquy... but never of me.
These words ride the autobahn, strokes from my soul are only back roads.

Riddles and options.
All we are is captions
Will be will is and what is will be.
So hesitate when you lay your money down, all them agents get you to the gate just the same
So long as passion is up for loss or gain
First class won't spare you no shame

Reggae vibes

Reggae love in my head.
Sonic vibrations rhythm in my soul.
I feel the sex in the room behind me.. lovers tasting lips desires hearts bodies and souls.
It's raping me, shaking me, taking me.. I said it before.
I'm writing here and painting on walls.
While love sounds become one with dub sounds.

Hurricane

The wind is whipping past my face carrying painful lashings from strands of hair that have become weapons in this icy late Spring  storm. It's telling me I have no business being in love. No business feeling angst. No business feeling loss. No business longing. Leave. Leave little silly child. Travel on... You're hanging on too long... It's time to say goodbye. Time to hurt and be hurt. But most of all, it's time to say goodbye....

Bronx tattles

Old man Henry called out my soul tonight. He said I was searching for something. I think he's right. It's that Bronx wisdom mingling with the liquor that pumps through his veins. But he sees something nobody else does as I sit sipping a glass of wine waiting for the table to clear. It could be only he sees it because nobody else's cares. I want to tell him my heart is in pieces and I don't know why. I want to tell him asking why only makes it worse. But it's not him I want to talk to. So I tell him a lie. I tell him I'm fine.

Trust is better without labels.. Status Schmatus

do you trust me?

this question's answer is the epitome of personal validation,

I've always believed that the only trust that is true is that which comes free of obligation.
ex: If you desire commitment from me you ought not require a label for the answer. As a matter of fact, my gift of true trust & commitment should come from my DESIRE to commit my longing for you & only you.... Not the necessity and reciprocity of that obligation.

If you are confused, let me just say this: If I say I love you. If I say I want you. If I open myself physically, emotionally, & actively to you... another's desire for me should not be of mind.

I am an attractive person, no Kim, no Nicole, no Ciara, by any means. But I am Coco. I have my attributes. I act on my impulses & out of my self, sensuality, intelligence & intrigue because I am who I am: who you desire. So think about it... why wouldn't another man desire me as well? It shouldn't threaten you, it should validate your choice. PERIOD.

Let me surmise that I am not the one all desire, but I am who YOU desire. Because of who I am. So why dammit wouldn't someone else agree with your choice? If this is the case, why would you want me to decline another advance solely because of my label tied to you & not because I just simply chose you?

I simply mean this: Is it more valuable that I have the label 'girlfriend' or 'wife'.......or would there be no value in my decline of another's advancement because I :::::chose you? Would you prefer I decline another's advance as "I'm flattered but...." or "I just simply am not interested" Take away the labels of "status" & allow a woman to choose based on simply who she wants & you have something real, not restricted.

Peace & Love, Coco

*the box, the label..is face security. The choice is the only commitment one should yearn for. If that is absent, that is the only matter for concern.

Stop Your Fussin'

Let the rain come down

Does anyone know who Toni Childs is?
Well, if you don't you should : http://www.tonichilds.com/

If you know Matt Goening, you should know her, she's of the same genre. When I thing of the Simpsons, I think of her her and vice/versa

My personal favorites are Zimbabwe and Stop Your Fussin'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utI69alKRUI

Listen to this gal and remember to stop fussin and remember shit could be worse.

Call me if you need a shoulder

What is love?

Baby don't hurt me.
I've come to see as of late there are infinite levels of love.


I am grappling with several levels of this word. This feeling. This feast. This fast. This battle. This gift. The epitome of pleasure. The overdose of fear obsession & pain.


Friends and loves

My forever

This. This is forever. I'm not sure how I get to forever, but you... you I know will be there.

Painters

I have a past

I've barely slept. He told me last that he thinks I'm in love with someone else. The man had been involved with intimately for quite some time before we even met.

But he didn't understand that my love for that man, although it was inconsequential to he and I and required no clarification my part, was intricate and benign . As were all my past relations...inconsequential in that they had no immediate influence on "us". My past has formed me, true. But my past has no other relavance. Nor should it be of any mind other than ' love it or leave it'.

I'm going to stand my ground on my sentimentality & fondness of prior romantic or sexual influences.

Your take?

Lonely in here

Dang I can only blame myself.... I never post anymore. My only follower left me. I can't say that I blame 'em, it's preeetty dry in here. And clearly I am now talking to myself. ouch.