Is the bar set too high?

I had a lovely convo with an old friend very recently. It's really a lot to absorb, so I'm going to mull it over publically and let you all in to hear my brain process...

1. I asked him why he wasn't dating anyone. He's smart, funny, adorable, so what gives? He said in a nutshell, he doesn't like anyone. He said that there are certain requirements that one has at thirty-five. Simple things, like, he wants to LIKE the person. Is that too much to ask? That we like the one we are involved with? Is the bar set too high?

2. After laughing myself silly, we talked about sex, friends, friends with benefits, lovers, being in love, breaking up, exes, baggage and then on to the innocent past. I talked about my last three serious relationships and then I just asked simply, why was I so afraid of boys when I was young? In some ways I love men my age and being involved with an intellecually stimulating, witty, beautiful man I can relate to, but there's a part of me that just wonders why I never tried to have a relationship when I was young. If they are so great now, why not then? I think of a handfull of guys back in the day that were my friends and admittadly, attractive. They all have turned out successful and interesting. So what was wrong with dating them back then?

3. We talked on, about things other people don't relate to and our commonalities. We talked about our youth, our experiences together and people from our past. Then suddenly I mentioned a name. THE "name". He litterally dropped and said wow, that's a name that took me back. He told me, man you were so in love with that guy. I didn't know why, but he was right. I spent high school in love with a fantasy of a man that never was or could have been the right person for me. But I liked him. It didn't hurt that he was Gorgeous, but I just simply liked him.

4. I missed out on the experiences I guess most girls have at that age because I set the bar early on that I had to like the guy. No matter about other things, those things terrified me. I just wanted to really like him. I didn't really like anyone in my twenties. I figgured I could get what I wanted dating here and there and just hold out for someone I liked. It seemed to get increasingly difficult as each year passed.

5. Now, the best thing I can say about the people in my life is, that I like them. When we find someone we like, we better just stick with it and appreciate it like Janis Joplin says: "If you got a cat for one day, ...if you want a cat for 365 days, right you aint got him for 365 days, you got him for one day. ...that one day better be your life, man. because, ...you can cry about the other 364, but youre gonna lose that one day, man, and that's all you've got. You gotta call that love."